"I'm fine...I'm fine," Alex gasped, trying to play it off like he hadn't just choked on pasta that was now trying to burn its way through is tongue.

He reached for his napkin and picked up his bread instead, only realizing it was bread when he went to dab his streaming eyes with it. He dropped the bread and grabbed his napkin instead, unfolding it completely so he could just bury his face in it. His ears were burning, and he knew his face must be bright red.

Could he be a worse date?"